The name of this book is “Whoops I Married a Bipolar.” I am aware that might offend some people or give the impression that I don’t take mental illness seriously, but I assure you I have never experienced so many levels of pain in my life then I have from witnessing and engaging with this illness. I know how serious it is and that it can ruin marriages, families and even take lives. I say, Whoops, because when we get married we have a set of visions and goals in our head of what that marriage is going to look like. From the thousands of woman I have spoken with, a majority of them did not understand or recognize that their partner had a mental illness and most times, the partner had not been diagnosed or have been in treatment for it when they met.

There is a time when you see your dreams of your marriage being pulled away piece by piece and you wonder, “How did I get here?” Where’s the person I fell in love with? By the time you and your spouse get through enough tragedy to actually get support, you as the partner are up to your eye balls in the fight to maintain some kind of balance and normality in your lives. There has been a lot of “Whoops” moments for me. A time when I felt cheated that I didn’t get the marriage I planned for. Like it was a mistake.

However, I believe that life is very much on purpose and that we have stories that we are intended to live and to tell. I can say Whoops, and laugh about it now. Whoops, look what I did. I stepped into the most challenging relationship, circumstance and season of my life. There are days when I want to say it was an accident and ask for a re-do, but I know in my heart that my husband and I are no accident. Every pain, tragedy, recovery and celebration is all part of our story… on purpose.

My husband and I have learned that we have to laugh at ourselves and at bipolar to keep going. When all the TV’s and lights are unplugged, we say, Whoop’s, look what bipolar did! And we laugh and plug them back in.

Mental illness is very serious and I suggest that you write down the number to the mental health hotline in your county and keep it handy. You can also reach out to NAMI the National Association for Mental Health for free classes and support.

Sometimes it may feel like a Whoops’, but that doesn’t mean you have to quit. You can pick yourself up and restart, Bipolar is famous for that, so take a page from their book and learn to get over the tough cycles and keep living your life.